Wednesday, June 30, 2010


It's getting hot again - 10am 107F.

Every time I check or discuss the weather I think of my Grandmother.  She's the one who sucked me into watching and talking about the weather. 

When she was alive she would always keep track of the weather where I lived and I would keep track where she lived in Richmond and it was always one of the topics of conversation when we spoke.

And we talked a lot - at least 3 times a week!

I miss her...

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


Here is a good word to know over here.

Misogyny (pronounced /mɪˈsɒdʒɪni/) is hatred (or contempt) of women or girls. Misogyny comes from Greek misogunia (μισογυνία) from misos (μῖσος, hatred) and gynē (γυνή, woman).

Well what do you know...

After that last post I get this from an internal auditor from the home office of one of our clients.

This person is not based in Dubai - he was just here to audit the business here.

This was his e-mail to me (after I answered his questions regarding regulatory requirements in this jurisdiction):

"it is very nice to meet you, you are the smartest, the sweetest person i have ever met there."

No English is not his first language - but he is a smart gentleman - he asked actual honest to God real business questions of me.

What a refreshing change from the questions I usually get like - "why do I have to have a signed agreement?" (doesn't one usually need signed agreements with clients?!) and "I've known him forever, why do I have to gather due diligence on him?" (how many times exactly do I have to explain to you that it's REQUIRED by the DFSA regulations?!)

Anyway this e-mail lifted my day.  He called me smart.

No Bueno

Today is not a good day.

I can't wait to be back in America, if only for a while.

That's all I have to say.

Monday, June 28, 2010

I made Quiche

And it is taaaasteeeee!

I had to make the crust for the Quiche from scratch because you can't buy frozen crusts here.

I'm getting pretty good at making crust from scratch if I do say so myself.

Of course I don't make the one from shortening - I make the one with BUTTER!

It's nice and flakey, and buttery and oh so good!

Necessity is the mother of invention - I'd never even attempt to make crust from scratch if I lived in the US.  I'd just pop by the Kroger and buy it.

I stuffed the Quiche with spinach, peas, and sausage (the pig sausage from the porn pork room, the naughty pork room!).  So I'm getting green veggies, protein and the butter and cream have calcium, which every woman needs. 

Spinach Quiche has about 350 calories per slice and I figure since I added sausage it's most likely about 400 - 450 per slice.  More on the 450 side because, well...Butter!

Anyway I was a cooking machine this weekend.  I made the Quiche, Mexican surprise, and an egg and sausage dish.  I've frozen it all and will have it as breakfast / dinner all week.

I have to say - cooking while having a vodka is quite fun!

In other news (don't I sound just like a newscaster?!)...

We're leaving in 2 weeks for AMERICA! 

You can't see me, but I'm doing a little dance!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

My legs, my poor, poor, legs!

Guess what I did...

I took a body pump class this morning.

And guess what the instructor had us do...


It's almost five hours later and my legs still feel like jello.

I have jello for legs people.

What the hell was I thinking when I took this class?!

Every time I step up or down off a curb I feel like my legs are going to collapse.


My arms are sore too, but nothing like my legs.  If my arms felt like my legs I wouldn't be able to type.

I'd be rocking back and forth lamenting the fact that I ever tried to work out.

Oh wait a minute - I am rocking back and forth - whining about the fact my legs are jello.

Can you believe that I'm thinking of going again on Tuesday?!

I must be crazy.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Weather update and a question

It's cooling off here...10am and only 92F.

My question:

Does anyone aside from me read my blog?

And yes I do read my blog - it cracks me up!  I crack me up!

Or maybe I don't want to know...what if no one is reading it? 

Will I be crushed?  Or will I not care?!

Because really this is for me - It is helping me to keep my sanity here in the middle of the big cat box.

So I guess it really doesn't matter if I'm writing to myself - but it sure would be fun to be writing while others are reading...

Ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, My Corona!

Sing that to the tune of my Sharona!

I had a burger and a Corona last night...and it was very tastee!

I know I should feel ashamed - but that's not this blog, that's this blog

This blog is the one where I can wallow in my hedonistic ways, that blog I get to berrate myself over my hedonistic ways.

Cause while I do feel a bit bad about the fact that my ass is as wide as a house, I really, really enjoyed those Corona's. And the burger. Oh, and the fries.

Git in my BELLY!

But then it goes to my ASS!

But it was good, and it was worth it!

Smack that ASS and give me another burger!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

The count down has started...

First a weather update - it's cooled off a bit.  It's 8am and only 95F outside and the high today is only suppose to be 105F.

Much cooler than the 116F it was a few weeks ago and so far this year it hasn't hit 150F.  That'll happen in July and August.

Now for THE COUNT DOWN!  We're going home for vacation in 15 days!!!

Can I get a Whoop!  Whoop!

I can hardly wait!  I get to see my bestest friend, I get to eat my favorite foods, and I get to walk Memorial Park.

We're also going to Alaska to see my brother - which I'm soooo excited about! 

We didn't go last year, which was the first time in 10 years I hadn't gone, and I missed him and the relaxing vacation we have when we see him.

There are only two sad things about going home.

1.  I won't get to see my sister - she's in NC now.
2.  I have to go back to Dubai.

bleh (you know how much I love that word!)

Anyhoo - I guess I'll sign off now; I'll just leave you with this little ditty from Neil Diamond...

Everywhere around the world

They're coming to America
Every time that flag's unfurled
They're coming to America

Got a dream to take them there
They're coming to America
Got a dream they've come to share
They're coming to America


Monday, June 21, 2010

My Crack Dealer

I have to go see my Crack Dealer tonight (aka my hair dresser).  He's leaving town for his vacation and won't be back until I'm gone on my vacation.

Which means I had to move my appointment up about a week or so which means that I'm really going to need my hair done by the time I get back from my holiday. 

Unless I let someone in Houston do my hair.  Which is kinda scary since I haven't had a hair dresser in the States since March 2005.

But I'll have to do something or my hair will be looking pretty scary.

Scary enough that small children will be running, screaming for their mommies.  Men and women will pass out from the fright of it all!

It'll be chaos!

It'll be scary!

And it just might be fun to scare everyone with my hideousness!

I have to tell you, I'm sitting here laughing my ass off right now with the images in my head.

I crack me up!!!

Sunday, June 20, 2010

I live in crazy town...

My husband and I went to the grocery store and before we started shopping we stopped by the Starbucks so I could have an iced green tea.  I've taught the Starbucks staff how to make ice tea because for some reason they don't drink iced tea here.

Don't understand why, don't pretend to understand why, really don't care as long as I can get the little guy to understand how to make it and serve it to me.

Anyway I digress.  While drinking my iced tea and eating my doughnut (yeah, I know, the weight will never come off if I don't stop eating.  All I have to say is; Step. Off. I had a bad day and I'm an emotional eater) we were reading the paper.

Y'all are going to love this.

An Iranian cleric issued a Fatwa against owning dogs.  Said it was too "western", dogs are unclean, and you'll be fined if you're caught with one.

Here's another article.

In this one a Saudi Cleric issued a Fatwa that says if a women breast feeds her foreign driver he becomes her son and therefore can mix with the women in the family without breaking Islamic law.  This is hilarious because the women are using this to say basically, so you'd rather we breast feed strange men rather than drive a car?

OMG is this CRAZY or what?!

And here's another crazy town article.

A scientist in London believes that humans will be extinct in 100 years and it's already too late to do anything about it.

It's a sandy, hot day in crazy town people and I'm going to have a drink - single malt.

It's medicinal.  I love my medicine!

Peace out!

Working in the Middle East

It's a trip here in the Middle East when new job opportunities come your way.

I had a guy send me an inquiry on LinkedIn yesterday wanting to know if I would be interested in a Risk Manager position.

Of course I said yes - I never turn down any opportunity without exploring it first.

I sent him my CV as a .pdf file - locked down (tell me I'm not paranoid).

And he sends me a note back saying thank you and could he have my "complete" CV with my personal details included.


I ignored the "personal details" part as I have my contact details as well as a statement identifying myself as an American on my CV. But I added my first 5 years of employment history (seriously, who cares what I did in 1993?!) and sent it back to him.

I get another e-mail back from this guy, thanking me again for my CV and could I please send a sheet with my personal details. He included a phone number so I called him. 

And he answered the phone in one of the most professional ways possible, "Yeah?". 


I asked if this was XXX, he said "Yeah", and I identified myself and asked what he meant exactly by personal details.

Guess what he wants?

My passport number, my birthday, my address, my age, marital status, where I'm from in the US etc...

Basically everything you need to steal my identity or come rob me.

So of course me being me, I asked why he needed that kind of information to determine if I was qualified for the Risk Manager position. This is the condensed version of how the conversation went:

Him: I just need it.

Me:  Well I need a better reason than that - what are you going to use it for?

Him:  Let me tell you about us, we're a property management company and we need a risk manager.  Give me your personal details, we need them to determine if you will go to the next round.

Me: Well I don't give out that information to people I don't know.  You contacted me from Linkedin and I have no idea who you are or if you really represent this company.  And next round of what?

Him:  Just give me your birthday, how old are you, what is your address?  I need to know if you fit the band.

Me:  Band of what?  I don't understand how my birthday and address are necessary to determining if I have the background for the position.

Him:  Just tell me your age.


Me:  How about this, take the average age of a university graduate, then add on my years of experience.  That will give you an idea.  I'm not comfortable giving you my personal information, my CV should have everything you need.

Him:  Well I'll let you know if you move to the next level.

Me:  Mmmm, Yeah. That's O.K.  Bye.

WTF?!  Give me an Effing break! 

So I look up the company online (I should have done this in the first place like I usually do) - and guess what?  The company doesn't have any listings for Risk Managers in Dubai, and the phone number he gave is not the same exchange as the company.  Numbers here tend to start with the same exchange depending on what area they are in.  Especially large companies like the one this guy was suppose to be from.

Then I went back to check his e-mail address - it was a Google account instead of a company one.  I guess I wasn't thinking this morning.  Maybe coffee deprived?

Best case, he actually did work for the company and was a sexist, racist, ageist, bigot.  At worst he was a thief.  Although really is a bigot better than a thief? 

Most likely not as thieves are usually equal opportunity.

America, America, my home sweet home....

I can't wait to be back in a real job market.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Hairdresser = Crack Dealer

That's what my husband said this morning.

My hairdresser was like a crack dealer.  Apparently I'm addicted to him.


He said I should just let him do my hair - it would be cheaper and he could do a better job.

Yeah, like I'm going to let him cut and color my hair!!!

He said that my visits to my hairdresser every 6 weeks was an addiction that needed an intervention.

He said; "I'm just trying to be a lovin' husband.  Help me help you"!

Oh My God but that man makes me laugh!

Btw - it's 7:30 in the morning and it's 101F.

And there is a wicked Shamal going on outside.

Oh I forgot to tell you...

I had a dream this morning.

I belonged to a gang; yes me, in a gang.

My gang colors were yellow - we wore yellow hoodies. 

O.K. if you know me, you know that I can't stand to wear the color yellow.  It makes me look like I have jaundice.

And there was another person in this yellow gang that I could see, just one.

There were others milling around in the background - but like in most of my dreams they were there, but not there, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, there was another gang (isn't there always?).

They wore powder blue hoodies and they wanted me to join them.

And boy did I want to join them, because really, powder blue versus yellow? 

There is no contest.

But I had to be careful because if the yellow gang found out I was leaving I would be in trouble.

Gang trouble.

But I left!!!!

And I got my powder blue hoodie - which looked really good on me!

The yellow gang member that was standing next to me (the person was faceless and genderless in my dream) tried to stop me.

They had a hold of my arm and was pulling on my yellow hoodie.

But the powder blue gang was pulling on my other arm and they won the pull off!

At the end of my dream I was wearing the blue hoodie, the yellow gang didn't win!

Can I get a Whoop!  Whoop!

It's great being me!

So wanted, so loved...he he he!

What a waste...

I joined a gym.

I've been about 5 times.

In two months.

I don't think this is working out for me, I should know by now that joining a gym is just a waste of money.

For me anyway.

Unless I have someone meeting me there I just can't be bothered.  I'm one of those people who need a work out partner.  I don't like being alone when I exercise.

It's boring.

Too bad my husband doesn't work out - that would make it so much easier to get into and keep in shape.

God knows we both need to exercise. 

There are so many good things about being in shape.

Good health, good mood, better sex.

And really the best thing about being in shape...

Being able to wear anything.

It is so much more fun to go shopping when you are fit - let me tell you.

I use to be able to pull anything off the rack and the only problem I really had was the waist was too big.

Cause even when I'm skinny I'm Lush.

Or if you prefer Voluptuous.

What can I say - I have curves. 

My body shape was the rage in the 50's.  Which is why I prefer those styles - I rock 'em.

I could have been a pin up in the 50's.  I have/had the bust, waist, hip measurements for it.

But alas and alak I live in the 2000's, the 00's?  What do you call it when you are at the beginning of a century?  The Naughts? The O's?

Anyway - I guess I'll go back to work and think on the fact I'm not using the gym...

NOT!  (I'm laughing, I'm laughing!)

Tuesday, June 15, 2010


Guess what?! My Bliss has not been found.

Let me clarify, my Arabian Mocha Sanani has not been found.

As a matter of fact the SOB's at Starbucks have discontinued the brand.

Can you fricken believe that?!  And all of the reviews on are excellent!

How can they do that to me?!
And why can't I add my two cents on the website?

I'm crushed!  And I'm not buying my beans at Starbucks anymore.


And, of course, no one in the UAE even knows that its been discontinued.

They keep telling me "It will come next week M'am".


They need to look at their own website or communicate the fact that there will be no more Arabian Mocha Sanani for anyone.  Anywhere.


I'm just going over to the dark side.  I've found another coffee that I like, I tried it for the first time today.  AND it's from Caribou Coffee.

Take that Starbucks!

I now love Caribou's Mocha Java.  And guess what? It too is made from Yemen beans.

So now I can have a proper Blissful experience again.



Wednesday, June 9, 2010

NHS = What Americans do NOT want!

This is how the NHS handles healthcare:

Per Prof Alan Maynard, University of York

"More money for cancer, means less money for motor neurone disease. More money for cancer means less to treat patients who have got Alzheimer's."

He said many of the cancer drugs were portrayed as wonder drugs when they only extend a patient's life by three to four months."

"You are undermining NICE and all the work it does to target resources where we get the biggest health gain, the bang for the buck. And this drives a horse and cart through logical and systematic rationing of health care resources,"

The UK system RATIONS health care.  If they determine that available medicines will only prolong your life an average of 3 - 4 months you don't get the drug.

But where do they draw the line?  Is one year an acceptable time limit to prolong life, or does the medicine need to prolong life five years or more?  Or is it subjective based on the disease and the area you live in (remember your doctor / hospital is based on your post code in the UK unless you go private and pay for your own health care).

In America we don't conduct a cost benefit analysis on how long you may live before the government decides if you can have the treatment.  We treat everyone. 

And yes you do get treated - if you show up to the hospital and you need to be treated - surgery etc... you have to be treated.  It's against the law for them to reject you on based on whether or not you can pay.

Can you imagine the uproar if the Government started putting limits on what treatment you could have because your estimated life span would only be an extra few months?!

Give me a break - we have fits when they try to take people off life support who are brain dead.  Do you think given a rationing system like the UK has that a Terry Shiavo situation would ever come to pass? 

I think not.  It would be way to expensive (15 years on life support) and she had no hope of recovery.

There is no way they would have put her on life support - she would have been declared dead the same day she collapsed.

And good luck if you get cancer or if you contract some non-main stream disease.  You are SOL.

And I can say I'd much rather be an uninsured American (and yes I have been) than an insured Brit.  I know, I've experienced both, first hand, as a local.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010


I get up in the morning, get ready, and get in the car to drive to work.  During the drive I always think of something to blog about.

Something cool.

Something funny.

Then I forget what it was when I get to work.

Same thing happens on the way home.

It's like my brain engages when I'm driving then shuts down when I get to work or get home.

Oh well...

I did have a weird dream this morning.

I dreamed that I was so fat no one could pick me up when I passed out - they had to drag me by the arm.

Through the party house.

What the hell is up with that?!

I mean I know why I dreamed I was as big as a house, because I'm, well, as big as a house.

But the party and people dragging me?!

I did watch Numbers before going to bed maybe that's why I was being dragged?!

So anyway that's all I got today.

Ciao Ciao

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Sunday Morning

I use to love Sundays.

Sleeping in, relaxing, chilling out before you having to go back to work on Monday.

Watching the Sunday morning show that had interesting stories, getting up and moving in slow motion.

Moseying down to Starbucks, the Kolatchee Factory, maybe taking a walk in the park.

But not anymore.

Sundays are crap.

I have to be at work by 7:30am and Saturdays are not the new Sunday here.

Because Friday is Sunday - most things are closed for the first 1/2 of the day and it's the big Mosque day.

It's also a work day for the hubby - so there's not any real hanging out or errands to run.

So Saturday is the day we usually run errands, get his hair cut, etc...

So while it is an off day it's not relaxing like Sunday back home.

And neither is Friday.  I mean yes, I sleep in, but it's just not the same.

You know?

My weekend is ass backwards.

And every Sunday when I come into just feels WRONG!

Every Sunday I have the fleeting thought of crap, I can't believe I have to work today.

It's Sunday - I should still be in bed.

Not putting on makeup.

Sunday was my makeup free day.


Friday, June 4, 2010

The Brazilian Butt Dance

This is hilarious!

I cannot believe this is real...

It looks like these women are beating these guys!

It looks painful - I can't believe these guys VOLUNTEER to be beaten like this!

Ha ha ha!

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Child Marriage and other things on my mind this morning.

I was reading this blog yesterday.

It's written by an American woman who's had the misfortune of living in KSA for the past 7 years.  She's just "escaped" and made it back to America.  In her blog she mentioned this 2005 article regarding child marriage.§ion=0&article=66983&d=15&m=7&y=2005

Now, when I say child I mean CHILD.

After doing the complicated math it turns out this baby was married off by her sperm donor (there is no way I'm calling this freak her father) for the first time at the age of FIVE.

Yep that's right FIVE.

Some perverted 50 year old man married this little FIVE year old girl.

I cannot tell you how angry this makes me.  But gets better...

Her Grandmother sued and was granted a divorce for the child, but when she went to go collect her she was no where to be found.

Why you ask?

Because her sperm donor sold married her off again at the ripe old age of TEN.

Now it doesn't say what the Grandmother was going to do now that the child was married again.  Hopefully they didn't have to go through another divorce, but could just pick her up and take her home.

Yeah right, like that happened!

She's in a country where a FIVE year old can be married off legally.  I bet the poor thing is still "married" to the pedophile - and at 15 she's probably considered "used" up and he (the "husband') is most likely looking for another TEN year old "wife".

Here's another article regarding a TEN year old Yemeni girl who was raped and beaten by her 30 something year old "husband".

She actually took matters into her own hands and went to the courts by herself to get a divorce.

This kills me - no one helped her but her Aunt and she only provided bus fare.


Here's an article about an EIGHT year old who was granted an annulment.  Her 20 something year old "husband" told the court that he had "consummated" the marriage but didn't beat her.

Well that was mighty nice of him wasn't it?!

Yes, your Honor, I raped the small child BUT I DID NOT beat her.

WTF people?!

In other news...

Apparently our communist president hired this idiot - Dr. Donald Berwick - to oversee Medicare and Medicaid.

This guy thinks the UK NHS system is the bomb.

Obviously he's never had to rely on it.

Clearly he's never looked deeply enough into it to realize that the government has made healthcare in the UK a nightmare.

He says "“The NHS is a bridge – a towering bridge – between the rhetoric of justice and the fact of justice.”

It's a bridge alright, a bridge to an early grave.

You have to wait a minimum of NINE MONTHS before you can get any surgery.  ANY surgery that isn't an emergency.  That was the wait time when I left the country in 2007.  It could be longer now - I'm not sure.

And I'm not sure what the NHS considers an emergency since I worked with a gentleman who needed heart valve repair surgery, his heart stopped about 6 times while he was waiting for his surgery.


And it didn't bump him up in the line any quicker.

And it takes about 6 weeks to get an appointment unless you pay extra and become a "private" patient.  But you still get the same crappy doctors.

My own personal experience with the UK healthcare system was pretty impressive.  As some of you know I had a stroke back in 2001. 

Guess what?

It happened in America so I was seen immediately and hospitalized for tests the same day (turns out my neurologist thinks the stroke was courtesy of Vioxx). 

Anyway, fast forward to 2006, we're living in London - Wimbledon no less.  Suppose to be a posh area (looks like the slums in America) and you would think there would be decent doctors there.

Because your doctor is determined by your address.  Yep - you don't get a choice of doctors in the NHS you are assigned one based on your home address.  So if you want to see one near work you are S.O.L. unless you want to pay out of pocket as a "private" patient. 

Something else we get to look forward to I'm sure if dipshit Dr. Donald Berwick has his way.

So anyway it's 2006, I'm having chest pains - which really concerns me because hey I've already had a stroke - and I go to the doctor.

I tell him my history.

And he says to me, without taking my blood pressure, temperature, or even listening to my heart - you may have gall bladder problems.  If it's still bothering you in a week come back in and we'll have a look at it.

I look at him and say seriously?!  What if it's a heart attack?  He just says you're too young, if you're still feeling bad in a week come back in.

The whole thing took about 10 minutes.

And since I'm still alive it wasn't a heart attack - but if it had been I'd be dead because the doctor was an incompetent shit. 

This is the same one that saw my hubby and diagnosed his ear infection as cotton stuck in his ear - come back in a week if it still bothers you.  His eardrum burst and he now sports a scar on his eardrum.

Here is an earlier post about the UK healthcare system and here is another one and below are more articles.

"Around 10,000 people die in England each year after their cancer is diagnosed late, and the UK has one of the poorest records in Europe for spotting the disease at an early stage."

"It comes as an alarming report reveals that British women are more likely to die from cancer than those in most other European countries. Death rates here are worse than in Croatia, Russia, Bulgaria and Lithuania."

Oh yeah - this is just what we need...

Or we can be like the Canadians...

They seem to have a healthcare system that is about as good as the NHS is.

OH MY GOSH!!!!  I can hardly wait to be treated like Shit when I get sick so I can die faster and in a more painful way.

Aren't you excited too!?

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Today is a Prolific Blog Day

I can't believe that I'm writing a 3rd entry today.

But I can't help myself - I've been thinking...

About coffee...

Ahhh coffee...

My favorite right now is Arabian Mocha Sanani.

It's grown in Yemen.

And of course it seems like the whole of Dubai is out of it.

I like it - so it's not available.

Kinda like last year in Dubai when you couldn't buy chicken for the whole of the summer.

I'm serious - no chicken for about 3 months.

It's a supply chain nightmare.

So now I'm trying something different because the best anyone can tell me at Starbucks is:

"Maybe next month ma'am, we get it".

They have no idea if it's going to be ordered again, if it's discontinued, or if it's on its way.

Sooooo.......we'll see - I can tell you this if I find it again I'm buying as many bags as I can get my hot little hands on and freezing them.

The other reason I decided to write again is dinner.


Indian food.  Yuck.

We're meeting my Father-in-law and about 10 other relatives at an Indian restaurant.

Which is fine - I like my FiL, but I am not a big fan of Indian food.

So I'm going to mix me a toddy.

A nice single malt toddy.

Put it in a "to go" coffee receptacle.

Pick the hubby up from the airport (he's in Kuwait).

Let him drive while I have a wee tipple.

And a hamburger.

ohhh that sounds really yummy.

Or a Corona and a burger - oh! oh! oh!

That sounds better than the single malt, an ice cold Corona and a burger.

I know, I know, a beer over single malt is heresy.  But I swear it's only this once that it sounds better - after all it's 3pm and 116F outside.

Yes I said 116F.

It's HOT.

I actually had the ice cold Corona/hamburger combo in Thailand a few times.

It was VERY tastee!

Too bad I can't do that here.

That's O.K. - a single malt is still very tastee.

But I'd rather pair that with a fat cigar, having girl talk with SP.

Which I will be doing in about 5 weeks when I'm in the US!!!


I cannot wait!

It's Hot - Not That's Hot....

Weather update...

It's suppose to get to 101F today.

It's already 109F.

It's 9:30am.

Hot 'nuff for ya?


That's the word I like when referring to the fact that I'm overweight.

Not Fat.

Not Chubby.

Yes, a girl I know told me I wasn't fat, I was just a bit chubby.

Hmmm, I don't like that word - it makes me feel like I'm five.

Only kids are chubby.





I can be Lush.

Both words bring to mind a curvy, sensual, woman that loves her body.

Revels in it and rolls around naked in a soft comfortable bed with 1,000 thread count sheets, down pillows, with down comforters.

Eating chocolate.

While beautiful buff men worship her.

Yeah, I can be Voluptuous.



Mmmmmmm yum.